Boy Rising

I called Porter's nurse first thing when I woke up yesterday morning. I wanted to know how he had done in the night. I woke up kind of anxious and feeling a little guilty I didn't stay at the hospital. She said they completely stopped the fentanyl drip and that he had been slightly agitated in the night. Nothing concerning, just that he couldn't get comfortable or relaxed. At about 1:00am she said he felt a little tired from breathing on his own so they put him back on the ventilator to give him a break. His levels were fine, he just felt tired. She said they would take him off again in the morning. She said everything else was great. As he becomes more alert, I think he is becoming more restless, which is good and also tricky. 

When we got to the hospital and I walked in - he literally lit up. Like his whole face smiled. He lifted his arm and reached for me. Can I just tell you - my heart leapt out of my chest. I can do anything with that kind of reaction. I went to the bedside and when the nurse went out, he was whispering to me about his uncomfortable night, his crazy dreams and that he wanted me to rub lotion on his hands. He was really communicative and very awake. Paul and I did his physical therapy as we told him about random things that are going on in our world...meaning our world outside of the hospital walls. Lots of great and happy things. Emma and Ryan keep sending him funny videos and voice recordings which he loves. We showed him a video Paul's friend put together about him and other clips people have sent. They make him smile. 

After the morning routine, they took him back off the ventilator and he did fabulous all day. They have also stopped giving him sodium flushes because he's no longer salt wasting. They also took out his central access line. So he has gone from about 8 drips that feed into 5 different tubes down to nothing but his NG (nasogastric) tube. They also took off the dressing of his surgical site and it's healing up nicely. Yay!!! So amazing. So grateful. Now we are just concentrating on getting his breathing stronger and starting to really increase his PT. Some awesome guys came in today and got him sitting up on the side of the bed again and talking him through how to hold himself up and which muscles to focus on. They had him leaning forward and trying to sit back up. They had him hold his head straight up for a couple of minutes with some help. They were encouraged with what he could do, commenting that with C5 injury it's great that he can do as much as he does. That's my boy.

Our friend, Calvin, recommended, Crash Reel, a movie we should watch about a snowboarder that had a traumatic brain injury and so we set up a little device that holds a cell phone and we watched it. Porter really enjoyed it. After, we were talking, and I said, "They're going to make a movie about you someday. It's going to be awesome." As he nodded his head up and down, his face said to me with a smile, "Ya they will." When he said that, I felt a physical warmth spread over my body and a well of hope springing up. I know Porter has the power to bless so many lives - whether it's through his story, or allowing them to serve him, or being a light in the lives of people that are around him. I know that his life has purpose. A very great purpose. Not like a typical kid. 

I received an email yesterday from my nieces mother in law. She is such an amazing woman and artist, with deep empathy and love, even for someone like Porter whom she doesn't know. She felt prompted to send him a print of a painting she had done for another man whom she had been commissioned to do. The meaning behind the print had great significance and so she shared the story with me. It's a painting of the first vision, but she titled it "Boy Rising" - because it is specifically about 14 yr. old Joseph Smith rising to his calling and it is especially for us, a reminder that Porter can rise to HIS calling. In her note she said, "...with all my heart, I want you to be the 'Boy Rising'. If it's God's will, then you will rise and walk. I know that God loves you beyond anything I can comprehend and if we flip to the last page of the book, we will see that it's a happy ending." I was so moved. I felt such a strength and renewed hope as I remembered that God has a plan for Porter. 

At about 8:00 pm some friends from Pocatello called and were out in the parking lot with some goodies for us. So I went down and visited with them for awhile. It felt good to talk to someone and be outside. They were so sweet to think of making time to come see me. It meant a lot. When I went back upstairs and showed Porter the notes from them he said, "Where are all the other cards?" He hadn't wanted to read them before and so I was very excited to hear him asking to read them. I got out the big padded envelope of them and we started to read. It was VERY fun to see his expressions and he would add a little tid bit here and there about some of them. A few of them surprised him, and made him feel so loved. I told him it was like a glorified valentines day. I would comment and tease him if one had a heart in it or if it was signed 'love'. It took us a solid hour to read them. His spirits were lifted and I could tell it made him happy. The nurses said they had never seen so many get well notes. Everyone was so nice to do that for him. 

Right before we left I said, I just want to hug you and he lifted his arm and I nuzzled down onto his chest and laid there with him for a moment. It was so warm and sweet and I was comforted. He said, "that felt good." With that, I went home with a heart full of love.